:-)
I came back because I'm busting with joy about Liam. He is an amazing, wonderful, super-cool, super-sweet, extremely fun person, and I'm enjoying him as well as our journey together more and more and more.
I have been particularly enjoying his acquisition of literacy, awareness of the world, and other skills that are typically acquired in a school setting in this culture. It is impressive how well he has acquired reading, spelling, math, and other such skills.
But, what's really beautiful to me is that during those years when he would have been contorting himself and forcing his brain to acquire skills he clearly didn't need or want at the time, he was able to acquire and refine other kinds of skills, perhaps not as readily identifiable or quantifiable as reading or calculating the area of a particular circle or knowing the intricate details of the Crimean War.
Liam, while beautifully preserving his child-like nature, even at 13 years of age, is perceptive and wise beyond his years. He is thoughtful and has a self-understanding that I wish I had now, let alone when I was 13 years old and getting myself into all kinds of trouble over my lack of self-awareness and the desire to please others and fit in. He is generous and sees this world as a loving, giving place. He naturally fits into that as a loving, giving person himself.
Another cool aspect of this is that he owns the process! Truly, we all ultimately own the process for acquiring the skills we have, but chances are that we may not know it. We have been led to believe that someone else, someone who may or may not even care about us, deserves credit for the things we learn, a la "If you can read this, thank a teacher." What a load of crap we have bought into! Sure, we can be helped (or hindered) by other folks. But the responsibility and the credit for learning the things we learn fall squarely to and belong solely to the learner, not the so-called teacher!
Liam is aware of this Big Lie, and he is aware of the Bigger Truth. He is aware that it is his fantastic ability to learn, his desire to learn, his ability to decipher and reason and retain and inquire and question...all these things are to his credit and no one else's. He is aware that this is true not only for him but for everyone, only most folks in our society don't get to live that reality as he does. This awareness is so much more empowering than the ability to read or calculate alone.
How fortunate am I to be his mom and be here for this process!?!
I am so acutely aware of how special each and every moment is with him. Forgive me for being morose, but I am keenly aware of how uncontrollable and unpredictable life can be, and I believe that this awareness is a gift that helps me appreciate our nows much, much more.
Because we had discovered and embraced unschooling when Liam was so young, I feel that we have been given a pass to avoid the usual pitfalls that many folks may believe go hand-in-hand with living with a teenager. Liam has always been shown consideration, compassion, empathy, respect, and kindness, and he is now extremely considerate, compassionate, empathic, respectful, and kind. I guess I was that way,
too, as a kid, but perhaps a bit more out of fear (fear of punishment, fear of judgment, fear of ridicule, fear of a butt-swatting). Liam knows no fear of these things. He is considerate, compassionate, respectful and kind because it is a cultural norm for him (in our family's culture).Well, there you have it: a post for February 16, 2008. Liam is sleeping over his friends' house, and I'm sure they're having a blast, as they should be!
Liam understands fully that his purpose for being here on Earth at this time is to live a Joyful Life. How cool is that?
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hello!
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